Issue #134 | September 4, 2026 | Previous issues​

Hey Reader,

I struggle with many things. I’m sure you do too.

But if there’s one thing I struggle with the most, it’s knowing when to stop.

There’s this overactive responsible bone inside of me. It’s pretty stubborn.

It says work always comes before play.

It’s a value I even try teaching my teenager.

After all, it’s responsible, hardworking people who get things done, right?

I agree.

Except, it’s also responsible, hardworking people who are so exhausted that they have little to no energy for much of anything else by the end of the day.

And maybe that’s where the whole “work before play” raises an eyebrow.

Because what happens when the work is never done?

When exactly do you get to play?

Responsible me makes sure that things are tidied up and the kitchen looks acceptably clean before I play.

There’s a problem here. Two, actually.

In order to play, I have to physically leave the house. Otherwise, I’m surrounded by reminders of all the work I should be doing. Then I end up feeling guilty and playtime is ruined.

The other problem is that a woman’s work is NEVER done. Especially if there are children or pets involved, the work is literally never-ending.

Which means if I have to finish all my responsibilities before I’m allowed to have fun, I'll be waiting for the rest of my short little life 😱.

You might as well chain us to our vacuums and mops.

Well, forget that!

You’re reading the Feral Housewife’s newsletter. Not Suzy Perfect Homemaker.

I don’t want to spend my life maintaining it. I want to live it (with a side of joy, please).

I’m all for a tidy house that smells fresh and clean, no essential oils needed. But since that ideal lives only in my head, it means I have to escape housework like I’m escaping prison.

And that involves top secret plans. Perfect timing. Strategic movements. Anticipating obstacles. Sneaking past the security guards.

So what's my success rate?

What's any prisoner’s success rate?

Yep, I had to know, so I asked Google Gemini.

Apparently, more than 90% of escaped prisoners get recaptured, lowering the success rate to less than 10%.

Yikes!

But also safer for us citizens.

But here’s the thing.

If you’re trying to break out of endless housework and over-responsibility so you can have fun and creativity and feel alive…then your odds need to be on the opposite end of that spectrum.

Maybe closer to 50–75% (wink wink).

Because somehow a lot of us have gotten the idea that we have to earn those things. That we can play only after the work is done.

But the truth is, there’s always going to be something else that needs to be done.

So are you willing to risk dying in a prison-like state of dullness?

I, for one, refuse to do that.

At 51, I’m finally learning some important things about life.

That I matter too.

That it’s ok to have fun.

That I don’t have to abandon myself to endless chores and obligations.

That my creativity matters (for my sanity too).

That feeling alive is a choice.

That joy is a gift I give myself (I don’t wait until someone gives me permission).

And maybe that choice sometimes looks ridiculously small.

Leaving dishes in the sink. Walking away from the laundry. Going dancing. Reading a book in the middle of the afternoon. Sitting in the sun because in NY it shows up randomly and briefly.

Doing something that serves absolutely no practical purpose other than making you glad to be alive.

It's your turn.

How do you choose to feel alive?

Reply and let me know how you're having fun.

With love and playfulness,

Anna

P.S. The work will never be done. Go play anyway.

​aferalhousewife.com​