Would you like to boost your confidence, self-worth, & emotional resilience? Every week I share tips on how to cultivate lasting personal growth, sprinkled with fun, creativity, and spontaneity in my weekly newsletter: The Ponderings of a Feral Housewife.
Sassy Living + 3 Ways to Talk (and Bond) for better relationships
Master your emotions with confidenceThe ponderings of a Feral HousewifeIssue # 69 || May 16, 2025 || Previous issuesβ β Hey Reader, β How's your week been? Fun or boring? Varied or routine? Stressful or peaceful? Mind dulling or stimulating? β Mine at a glance looked like this: New haircut (which prompted new shampoo / conditioner / lip liner from Target) Airport run β Horse riding lesson π΄ Confidence coaching lessons Long walk on the rail trail with 2 delightful friends (we discussed literature & Jane Austen, etc. π) Bingeing on the first season of Heartland (for the love of horses :) π A personal session with a Life Coach Calming my nervous system so I fully enjoy my staycation (which also means saying NO to people wanting to hang out). Oh and saving a turtle's life! π’ β Your turnI invite you to reflect on your week. What did you do that made you feel alive, sassy, or authentic? Did you have any new, fun, or exciting adventures? Did you live on autopilotβsaying yes to things because you felt obligated to be helpful and available? Did you have any aha! moments? β Here's one of my aha! moments. My 12 year old son called me from vacation. He was bored because he was hanging out with a bunch of adults. I wanted to "rescue" him. I asked him to notice the surrounding colors, shapes, and smells. I wanted to teach him how to ground himself in the moment so he could learn to relax (without video games and tv). He replied, "ok, goodbye, you're in mom mode now." And he hung up. I had to laugh. It was true. I went straight into mother/teacher mode which immediately shut off our communication. β What could I have done to encourage conversation with my child? β It's normal to look for opportunities to train our children. It's our job! However, it's also our job to maintain an open window of communication so our loved ones FEEL SAFE sharing their feelings with us. If you're not a parent, KEEP READING. These tips apply to all relationships! If you want to maintain happy, peaceful, and meaningful relationships, you need to improve your communication skills. More's involved than just "listening". Everyone has an intent or a purpose to their speech (whether they realize it or not). As a listener, we have our own "agenda" during conversations. With my son, my goal should have been to keep him talking. I want my child to feel open and safe to share his feelings with me so we maintain a strong bond. Here are 3 things I could've done to achieve my goal: β 3 tips to foster communication-Validate -Empathize -Ask curiosity questions β None of these things come natural to me! I am still learning how to validate and empathize with others, including myself. Each of these steps take practice, so don't give up if you're like me. β Validation sounds like what a good friend would say to make you feel better: Of course you're bored, you're hanging out with a bunch of adults who don't even speak your language. β Empathizing would have endeared me to him. That must be tough hanging out with adults when you'd rather be with kids your age. I'm sorry you're stuck in adult conversations. β Imagine how seen and understood he would have felt! Had I created this open, safe space, he might have been more inclined to let me give him advice (maybe lol). Still, before we jump in and offer advice, (which is us trying to fix problems we aren't responsible for) we could be curious instead and let them draw their own conclusions. β Curiosity questions are where the fun, action, and helpfulness come in. I'm curious, why do you feel that way? I'm curious, what does it feel like to be bored? I'm curious, what would you like to do instead? You don't have to use the word curious every time or drill them. The goal is to ask one or two questions to stimulate their mind, explore their feelings, and help them discover choices they might have. β Your turnIn the upcoming weeks, try using these 3 tips and let me know what you notice happens in your conversations and how people respond to you. Also, feel free to use the 3 tips in communication with YOURSELF. You have ongoing conversations in your mind. Self-talk is one of the MOST powerful self-help tools there is! β Poetry CornerSpeaking of authentic connections, letβs celebrate creativity with a readerβs poem! A few weeks ago I shared a poem from a reader but embarrassingly forgot to include his name. I was terrified that he was going to be offended and mad because I failed to give him credit. I apologized and boy was I thankful that he wasn't offended at all! Humility is one of the BEST (if not most important) qualities a person can cultivate. In his honor, I'm going to share another of his poems. β Spring in the Hudson Valley by Vincenzo Costa Like a pregnant woman in labor pains The Hudson waits for the birth of spring. It waits to cut loose from its icy chains Cracking down the stream with a ring. β And the Apple tree and the Concord vine, Blooming unsuspiciously of a killing frost, Bow their blooms to the bee and sunshine For a sweet and bountiful fall's harvest. β Emerging from under the melting snow Smiles Mohonk Mountain and the ridge As people flock to its rolling hills below. β Some of them climb, walk, or take a hike Upon the rocky ridge and grassy slopes; Others bend in a bow or stretch as a pike. β In SummaryPut on your sassy girl pants and get out there and MAKE some fun. Saving that turtle reminded me: small acts of courage and kindness matter. Be a powerful communicator: validate, empathize, and ask curiosity questions. Put your thoughts and feelings to paper! Write a poem. Draw. Paint a picture. β Don't be afraid to share your creativity with others! β PLEASE send me your brave acts of creativity or life-experiences and I'd be happy to share them with this lovely community. β Until our next feral, fun, Friday adventure, Anna P.S. If you're enjoying this newsletter why not forward it to a friend? βwww.aferalhousewife.comβ βhttps://linktr.ee/aferalhousewifeβ β |
βMaster Your Emotions with Confidence
Would you like to boost your confidence, self-worth, & emotional resilience? Every week I share tips on how to cultivate lasting personal growth, sprinkled with fun, creativity, and spontaneity in my weekly newsletter: The Ponderings of a Feral Housewife.
Master your emotions with confidence The ponderings of a Feral Housewife Issue # 73 || June 20, 2025 || Previous issues Hey Reader, Everyone wants to be successful. At something. But what does success mean to you? The truth about success Success is a measuring stick, but you get to choose the stick. What are you measuring? Whose standards are you using? Where did those standards come from? The truth is, you get to define what success looks like for you. But failure? That's often easier to...
Master your emotions with confidence The ponderings of a Feral Housewife Issue # 73 || June 13, 2025 || Previous issues Hey Reader, Summer is around the corner. (Next Friday officially). This is MY SEASON! Sunshine, warmth, time outdoors, ice cream, and soon THE BEACH! β± I LOVE sitting outside and seeking peace and stillness despite living in a world of bustling traffic, cackling chickens, and kamikaze bugs π¦. πThe warm sun says, 'I love you'. π¨The cool breeze says 'I'm here, when you need...
Master your emotions with confidence The ponderings of a Feral Housewife Issue # 72 || June 6, 2025 || Previous issues Hey Reader, Ready for a little fun and nonsense today? I hope you enjoy this little creative diversion. The following is based on a journal entry I wrote on March 29th, just for fun π. Welcome to nonsense Once you see it, you can't unsee it. It has built an obstacle course around my ceiling fan. I get the feeling I've been spied on for months. Probably a whole season. I was...